Status update. Current obsession: paleo ranch dressing. on ALL of the things.
I blame Juli Bauer and her new fantastic cookbook. I started making all things buffalo chicken related and putting the paleo ranch dressing from her cookbook on EVERYTHING: Buffalo Chicken Spaghetti Squash Casserole, Buffalo Chicken Lettuce Wraps, roasted carrots, broccoli, tomato slices, roasted cauliflower, sweet potatoes, on hard boiled eggs…you name it. I tried it. I can’t get enough.
I even ate carrots and ranch dressing. Talk about a childhood throwback, amiright? The only way I ate vegetables back in the day was if they were slathered in ranch dressing. And by vegetables I mean only raw carrots. Nope, I didn’t eat any other vegetables. I was a really healthy kid, clearly.
Fair question though. What even IS ranch dressing? I mean, now I know how to make REAL ranch dressing from actual ingredients you can recognize. But check out the ingredients on everyone’s favorite brand, Hidden Valley Ranch:
Soybean Oil, Water, Egg Yolk, Sugar, Salt, Cultured Nonfat Buttermilk, Natural Flavors (Soy), Spices. Less than 1% of Dried Garlic, Dried Onion, Vinegar, Phosphoric Acid, Xanthan Gum, Modified Food Starch, Monosodium Glutamate, Artificial Flavors, Disodium Phosphate, Sorbic Acid and Calcium Disodium EDTA as Preservatives, Disodium Inosinate and Disodium Guanylate. (From Fooducate)
Can I get an
amen OMG EW WTF ARE YOU SERIOUS? What even is all that stuff? I don’t know about you, but I’ve never heard anyone say “Mmm, calcium disodium EDTA.” Ugh.
So how about some real-deal, tastes just like everyone’s favorite brand but you aren’t putting sh*t and your body and you won’t feel like sh*t afterward? That’s my kind of dressing.
Especially this one because it’s so damn easy to make. Literally chuck all the ingredients (except herbs) in a tall measuring glass, stick in an immersion blender, and boom. Add herbs and blend again.
WHAT IS THIS MAGIC?!
p.s. If you got that Harry Potter reference we are now best friends. For life.
- ¾ cup avocado oil or light olive oil**
- 1 whole egg, at room temperature
- ¼ cup full fat coconut milk
- 1 tsp mustard (I like dijon or stone ground)
- 1 Tbsp red wine vinegar
- 1 tsp lemon juice
- ¾ tsp garlic powder
- ¾ tsp onion powder
- ½ tsp sea salt
- ¼ tsp pepper
- ⅓ cup packed chopped herbs – equal parts chives, cilantro, and dill (about 2 Tbsp chopped each)
- Place all the ingredients except the herbs in the bottom of a tall measuring cup (that can at least hold 2 cups and has high sides) or wide-mouth mason jar. I like to put the egg and all the other ingredients in first, then add the oil last.
- Let the ingredients settle at the bottom of your jar. Stick the immersion blender all the way to the bottom of the jar, then let ‘er rip! Move the blender around in the bottom of the cup to get some more air in there. You can also move the blender up and down slightly to do this, but don’t pull it out of the mayo unless you want to make a huge mess in your kitchen. It should become completely emulsified and ranch dressing-like in about 30 seconds!
- Add in herbs on top of the mayo, then pulse, moving the immersion blender up and down until all the ingredients are completely mixed. Season to taste with additional salt and pepper.
- The ranch will thicken up a bit in the refrigerator, and will last for about a week.
**Either use a light-tasting olive oil or avocado oil. If you use extra virgin olive oil here, it will NOT taste good. The flavor is too strong for mayonnaise.
Serving ideas: on top of some Buffalo Chicken Casserole, on sweet potato fries, as a dipping sauce for roasted carrots (or any other roasted vegetable), raw veggie dippers, as a salad dressing, on grilled or baked chicken…the possibilities are endless.Dig in. Or dip in? whatever. Slather it on all of the things. Or go straight in with a spoon. Nobody else? Just me? Totally normal, I swear.